Reproductive Grief Care
An invitation to hope and heal in a compassionate environment.Always free, always confidential.
Support for Women, Men and Couples.
Shared sorrow is an endurable sorrow. We were never meant to suffer alone; we are meant to comfort and encourage one another.
– Bob Kellemen
You are not alone.
Pregnancy loss, infertility, and abortion surround us. Both women and men are affected. Unfortunately, we live in a culture that is uncomfortable with grief, especially the loss of the unborn, leaving those suffering feeling isolated and alone.
At Sierra Pregnancy + Health, we recognize reproductive loss can significantly affect men, women, family members, and loved ones. We want to change the culture of disenfranchised grief and offer a safe place for those grieving to find hope and healing.
We offer support through individual sessions, and for those not in the greater Sacramento area, we provide remote support through confidential video conferencing.
If you or someone you know is hurting from a pregnancy loss, infertility or an abortion decision, please contact us for more information on how we can come alongside and offer care and support.
Types of Reproductive Loss
What is reproductive loss?
We identify reproductive loss to include, but are not limited to, miscarriage, stillbirth, infertility, hysterectomy, adoption placement or failed adoption plan, unwanted childlessness, and abortion. Regardless of the type of reproductive loss, when life doesn’t go as anticipated, these losses often occur with a lack of support and trauma and can lead to complicated grief.
What is a miscarriage? Is it a type of abortion?
A miscarriage is the loss of a baby before the 20th week of pregnancy. The medical term for a miscarriage is spontaneous abortion. But it isn’t an abortion in the common meaning of the term.[1] A miscarriage happens naturally and spontaneously, not through surgery or medication. Unfortunately, there is no way to stop a miscarriage from happening. There are many types of miscarriages, and some may require medical support. It is important to see a medical professional for an exam and possible follow-up care.
If you or someone you know has experienced a miscarriage, we offer grief care for men, women and couples. Please consider scheduling a phone consult to learn more about how we can offer support.
What is stillbirth? Do I need an abortion if this happens?
Stillbirth is defined by the CDC as the death or loss of a baby before or during delivery at 20 weeks of pregnancy or later. The options for mothers of stillborn babies are generally significantly more limited. Almost all stillborn babies are delivered through labor induction or after a mother goes into labor naturally. Stillbirth affects about 1 in 160 births and about 24,000 babies are stillborn each year in the United States.
Support for mothers of stillborn babies should not only help them emotionally process their labor and delivery experience, but it should provide education and practical resources for physical postpartum recovery, which lasts six weeks after giving birth – whether or not your baby was born alive.[1]
If you or someone you know is experiencing a stillbirth, we offer services to help support families through the birthing process and after care. To learn more, please consider scheduling a phone consult with our Director of Reproductive Grief Care.
What is infertility?
Infertility is defined as not being able to get pregnant despite having frequent, unprotected sex for at least a year for most couples. [1]
In the United States, 10% to 15% of couples are infertile and about 1 in 5 (19%) women aged 15 to 49 with no prior births are unable to get pregnant after 1 year of trying. Also, about 1 in 4 (26%) women in this group have difficulty getting pregnant or carrying a pregnancy to term. Though infertility is often thought of as a woman’s problem, infertility can affect both men and women and sometimes, no cause can be found. [2]
Due to the many factors that may cause infertility, discussing desires for pregnancy with your health care provider will help identify potential risks or need for testing.
If you or someone you know is having difficulty achieving pregnancy, we can offer grief support for women, men and couples. Please request a phone consult for more information.
What is a hysterectomy?
A hysterectomy is a surgery to remove a woman’s uterus or womb. The uterus is the place where a baby grows when a woman is pregnant. After a hysterectomy, a woman will no longer have menstrual periods and can’t become pregnant. Sometimes the surgery also removes the ovaries and fallopian tubes. [1]
A health care provider might recommend a hysterectomy if a woman has:
- Fibroids
- Endometriosis that hasn’t been cured by medicine or surgery
- Uterine prolapse – when the uterus drops into the vagina
- Cancer of the uterine, cervix, or ovaries
- Vaginal bleeding that persists despite treatment
- Chronic pelvic pain, as a last resort
Dept. of Health and Human Services Office on Women’s Health
This [Reproductive Grief Care] program saved me. Due to my situation, I needed help fast. I was a mess. Tanya always reiterated her availability to me, letting me know I could contact her anytime. She strongly supported me with kindness, empathy, knowledge, and a genuine, caring heart. I had no idea something like this program existed. I suspect if more people knew about it, there would be a line out the door. It is heartbreaking to know there are countless individuals walking around who feel broken, lost, depressed, and immeasurable sadness because they are unable to deal with their losses and grief. I can only hope they find a way to you.
Ways we can help.
One on one/couple support
We offer individual support sessions for anyone hurting with a reproductive loss. We also invite partners to attend sessions since all can benefit from sharing and learning of healing resources. For more information or to schedule a pre-lesson, please click the button below to schedule a phone consultation.
Remote - Video Conferencing Care
For those who cannot meet during our clinic hours or live outside our local area, we offer video conferencing support. For more information, please click the button below to schedule a phone consultation.
For Immediate Support
If you are not ready to contact a reproductive grief care advocate, we have many book suggestions and website partners to consider. Please click here to download our Suggested Resources.
Schedule a Free Phone Consult
Help to Hope Workshop
Many of us know someone who has experienced a reproductive loss. It’s common to struggle for the right words to say or know how best to support your loved one with good resources and referrals.
There is hope. Come learn how to help those who grieve. Throughout the year we offer Reproductive Loss Network’s Help to Hope Workshop. This class brings a biblical response to a grieving world through educating, equipping, and encouraging individuals to support those touched by reproductive loss.
This workshop includes:
- Understanding the impact of reproductive loss
- Knowing where loss and life connect
- Recognizing the biblical model of grieving with hope
- Learning healing language with examples
- Joining others in a Christ-centered healing network
What participants had to say after attending:
“Very impressed with your breadth of knowledge, empathy and understanding. Excellent workbook!”
– Project Rachel Coordinator
“Great general information to get started. Helped me tremendously on dealing with grief of all kinds.”
– High School Small Group Leader
“It not only helped me with my own grief but gave me great resources and helped in my role as an advocate.”
– Pregnancy Clinic Advocate
“I am leaving with a better understanding as to how to help those around me during their crisis situation.”
– Volunteer
“Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love. The only cure for grief is to grieve.”
Dr. Earl Grollman
Additional Resources
Websites
- An Even Place – Virtual After Abortion Care
- Our Little Sparrows – Support for life limiting or fatal diagnosis during pregnancy
- Grace Like Scarlett Micarriage & Loss Resource
- The Morning – For women finding joy after pregnancy & infant loss
- Joy in the Sorrow of Miscarriage and Childlessness
- Childlessness – Infertility- Miscarriage
- Infertility – Inability to Carry
- Sacramento Memorial Garden
Recommended Books
- Grace Like Scarlett – Miscarriage and/or Stillbirth
- Forgiven & Set Free – After Abortion Care
- Healing the Father – For Men, after abortion
- Longing for Motherhood – Infertility/Childlessness
- What Grieving People Wish You Knew and What Really Helps – For Supporters
- Safe in the Arms of God – Truth from Heaven About the Death of a Child